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    November 23

    请勿当道德故事读

    陈世旭:
          小张乙最近找了个女朋友,叫丁丁。丁丁长得很漂亮,小张乙喜欢得不得了,向她发誓说:“今后你说干啥我就干啥,刀山敢上,火海也下,只要你高兴就行。”丁丁歪歪脑袋:“真的?说话可要算数。”小张乙拍拍胸口:“当然是真的,说话不算数那是小狗。你随时可以考验的。”丁丁说:“那好。不过,你只管放心,不会让你上刀山下火海的。”两个人那天就这样一路说笑着,去了电影院。
          电影开映,影院里的灯光熄灭,只有放映的光线穿过了黑暗的上空。光柱下,小张乙和丁丁的前面一排坐着一个秃顶。丁丁来了灵感,忽然靠过来,对小张乙说:“你先前发了誓的,我说干啥你就干啥,不会反悔吧?”小张乙说:“怎么可能!”丁丁说:“那好,你照那个秃顶给一巴掌。”小张乙一怔,有些犹豫:这玩笑怕过分了。丁丁一噘嘴:“我就晓得你说话不算数的。”小张乙急了:“谁说的?”说完就直起身子,伸出手,拍了前面那秃顶一掌。秃顶受了惊,猛然回头,黑暗中看不清他的怒容,但可以听得到很粗重的怒气。小张乙很亲切地打招呼说:“老曹你好,你也来看电影?”秃顶不便发作,很不高兴地回答:“你认错人了。”小张乙连忙道歉:“对不起,对不起。”秃顶于是回身仍去看电影,一场差一点闹起的纠纷,总算避免了。小张乙用脚碰一下丁丁,很是得意。丁丁连连点头,表示满意。
          小张乙以为通过了考验,安安心心地看起电影来。不料电影结束前,丁丁再次要求:“你还能不能给那秃顶一巴掌?”小张乙说:“这怎么可以呢,刚才……”丁丁马上打断他:“不行就算了,不要为难,我晓得你就那点德行。”小张乙一咬牙,辩白说:“你小看人!”说着就抬起手又向前面的秃顶击了一掌。秃顶这一次的愤怒是可以想象的,他从座位上一下蹿起来,回转身,猛扑小张乙。小张乙不慌不忙,一面伸手挡住他的身子,一面用研究的口气很疑惑地说:“你怎么能不是老曹呢?你肯定是我对面办公楼的老曹嘛,为什么要不承认呢?”“谁不承认?”秃顶压着嗓子咆哮起来,气喘咻咻地从胸前抽出身份证:“你仔细看看,我到底是不是你说的那个老曹。”小张乙装模作样地借银幕的反光认真审视了好久,才把身份证归还秃顶,一边嘟嘟哝哝:“真像,太像了,真是奇迹。”秃顶很不屑地“嗤”了一声,再次谅解了小张乙。
          电影散场了,小张乙一身轻松,对丁丁吹嘘起来:“怎么样,该信得过我吧?”没想到丁丁却说:“急什么,没完呢,你能再给他一巴掌吗?”这时候,他们已经走到电影院外面,通明的灯火下,那位秃顶就站在他们身前的下一层台阶上。在灿烂的灯光照耀下,那秃顶闪闪发亮。小张乙的脸一下子拉得像长长的苦瓜,嗫嚅说:“你这不是要我的命吗?”丁丁看着他那副可怜相,不再说什么,冷冷地哼了一声,就要走开。小张乙一把拉住她:“别走,我听你的就是。”接着就是前面那倒霉的秃顶挨了第三个巴掌。秃顶这一次没有别的选择,只有跟小张乙拼命了。小张乙却欢天喜地地叫起来:“老曹哇老曹,你原来站在这里。刚才在里边我没认清,拍了别人两巴掌。”
         这是和朋友闲聊时听来的故事,似乎有些无聊,却有道理在其中:世界上没有不可化解的难题,问题在于你是否具备足够的智慧。

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